December 17, 1997, when our son Adam told us he was gay, our world
was turned upside down. We were absolutely devastated. We desperately
needed someone to comfort us, to assure us that our son, our family
would be okay. But we were too embarrassed and scared to admit
this secret to anyone, to reach out for comfort.
We tried several counselors. All of which were understanding,
but did not give us the answer we wanted. We really wanted to
hear them say, "Mr. and Mrs. Ellis, your son is not gay,
he is just confused and we will be able to help him." We
did not get that answer, so we moved on.
In the middle of my restless nights, I would get on the Internet
to find anything that would give me peace. I found nothing. We
don't want you to feel as alone, hopeless and desperate as we
did. We are committed to helping you through this. We know you
are searching for comfort, answers, and a way to make sense of
I was certain of only one thing back then: I did not want to
lose my child. I knew I would have to find a way to change him
or to accept him. I did not know how to start doing either one.
I felt trapped between my love for my son and the teachings of
The darkness that is covering your life will go away. We can
tell you that from experience. The good news is that you can and
will come through this a better, stronger and more loving person
to the World around you and all God's children. You and your child
will be okay, but you must work to understand the truth in your
So what should you do if your child is gay? You can't turn your
back on them. You love them too much for that. But how can you
accept something about them that your church, your family, your
friends and possibly even yourself finds unbearable, immoral or
If we are successful with this website, you will find the answer
to this challenging question. It is our prayer that our efforts
will keep you from losing your child.
--- Patti Ellis