absolutely, my parents made me gay. They had sex, my mom got pregnant,
and bam!...I popped out of the womb - brown hair, brown eyes,
and gay! So, yes, technically my mom and dad made me gay, but
that happened long before they gave me the issues that I have
today (i.e. - being stubborn, selfish, spending too much money,
and so on...) It seems blaming yourself is one of the first reactions
that many parents take when their children come out to them. I
guess they have to have someone to blame, and since humans are
naturally harder on themselves than anyone else they figure it
was their own fault.
I cannot imagine what exactly a parent could do to change their
children's sexual orientation. Do parents make their children
straight? I come from about the most balanced and sane family
possible. Both my mom and dad were always present and active throughout
my childhood and we never had any major issues. I really cannot
imagine anything that my parents or anyone else could have done
to cause my homosexuality. It's not exactly something that you
can change, and believe me, there have been times when I have
I can remember being as young as five and having homosexual feelings.
I didn't recognize them until much later in life, but I do remember
them. It wasn't until my sophomore year in high school that I
came out to myself. Up until that point I had just ignored all
my homosexual feelings and dreams, thinking, or hoping, that they
would just go away. But of course they never did. The thought
of me being gay never entered my mind prior to 10th grade. Homosexuality
seemed like such a foreign concept, and I never thought that I
could be gay. Although I felt that my parents had an open mind,
my community held such a negative view of homosexuality. I do
not know how I could have survived without the support of my family.
If you ever wonder whether your children remember the things
you say, remember this. One of the most comforting things during
the strife of my outing process was my parent's repeating phrase,
"No matter what you say or do, we will always love you." Just
having them say this gave me enough strength to come out to them.
Did my parents make me gay? No. But they did make my coming out
experience a lot less painful than it could have been.