Hope... How Our Family Has Progressed Hope... How Our Family Has Progressed
NAV Are these Questions Familiar? NAV
NAV Did Your Child Come Out to You? - Parents are never prepared to accept the news that their children are gay. I will never forget that Friday night in December of 1997. NAV
NAV Is My Child Gay or Confused? - When Adam told us he was gay, we thought, "This can't be true, he's just confused". NAV
  Should I Accept My Child's Orientation? - For Patti and I, our first reaction was absolutely not. He is only 16 years old. What does he know about sexual relations? NAV
  Am I Ashamed of My Child or of Myself? - When Adam came out to us, shame was a big word in our lives. I was afraid that people would overlook Adam's wonderful qualities and focus on just one aspect of him ---- his sexual orientation. NAV
  Did My Parents Make Me Gay? - Yes, absolutely, my parents made me gay. They had sex, my mom got pregnant, and bam!...I popped out of the womb - brown hair, brown eyes, and gay! NAV
  Is Homosexuality a Sin? - When it comes to the subject of homosexuality, our religious institutions remind me of the Civil Rights Movement of the 60's. NAV
  Who Can I Talk to About This? - Take comfort, you are only lost for a little while. There is a light at the end of this long, lonely path. NAV
  What is God's Plan? - How does being gay fit in God's plan? This is the hardest question to discuss. The answer will depend on whom you are talking to. NAV
  Why Would My Child Choose to be Gay? - You have just asked an important question. Ironically, once you have exhausted all of the obvious possibilities, you will probably come to understand the absurdity of the question itself. NAV
Other Points of Interest
  Our Son's Story - Adam was always a bright and happy child. He was also quite stubborn. As his father, I always found that frustrating in one respect, but I also admired it.  


(-- "Hope... How Our Family Has Progressed"... CONTINUED --)

We are neither ashamed of nor embarrassed by this fact about Adam. To the contrary, we are extremely proud of our son for he possesses all of the attributes of true manhood. He is intelligent, hardworking and creative. He is loyal, loving and compassionate, but most of all he is courageous. He is tough as nails, tougher than any other kid we know for the amount of abuse he has and must endure on a regular basis.

We, as a society, have created an unwritten pact that it is OK to despise gays and lesbians because we can't understand why or how they could be attracted to the same sex. We have a news flash for you -- they don't understand it either. Just because we don't understand something, it does not give us the right to condemn it and declare it a sinful act. My son, like all gays and lesbians, only wishes to fulfill his desire to love and be loved, just like every other human being on this planet.

Are you wondering, "Where is God's perfection in a child who is gay?" I believe that the perfection that God seeks is in the way people react to this child.

When we perceive an imperfection in one of our children, whether it is a birth defect or mental retardation, we pray fervently that God will remove the imperfection. However, God doesn't see these conditions as imperfections. The imperfection exists only in our minds. The "imperfection" of homosexuality is no different.

God allowed us to see there was nothing "imperfect" about Adam. The imperfection was in us. I believe that God has a purpose in making some of His children gay or lesbian.

I believe God's purpose for making Adam gay was to show Patti and I, and the rest of the world, the true meaning of unconditional love. God did not send Adam into our lives for us to fix him, change him, or make him into a miniature version of ourselves.

In answering our prayer, He showed us we were placing conditions on Adam in order for him to receive our love. Love without conditions is what God offers us and He wants us to offer that to each other in return.